Terms of service.

Effective and last updated October 8, 2026

Please read section 15 carefully. Unless you opt out within 30 days, it requires you and us to settle most disputes by individual binding arbitration rather than in court, and it waives class actions and jury trials. Where your local law doesn't allow that, it doesn't apply to you.

01Who's dealing

“Degenerate Dealer”, “we”, “us” and “the house” mean MemberPad LLC, doing business as Degenerate Dealer and based in Ohio, United States, which makes The Dirty Poker Timer and whatever we ship next. “You” means the person who made the account, or anyone otherwise using the service. These terms are a binding agreement between you and us. They cover the website, your account, the subscription, the software, and the invites, leagues and messages that go with them (together, “the service”). By making an account or using the service you agree to them and to our privacy policy. If you don't agree, don't use the service.

02Who can play, and your account

You must be 18 or older, or the age of majority where you live if that is higher, and live in the United States or Canada. The dealer's language is not for kids, and we mean that literally. One person per account. Give us accurate details and keep them current. You're responsible for what happens under your account, so pick a real password, keep it to yourself, and don't hand it around the table. Tell us straight away at support@degeneratedealer.com if you think somebody else has it.

Accounts are free. An account on its own costs nothing and never asks for a card: a player can make one to answer invites and to turn on texts for game invites, and keep it for as long as they like without paying. The subscription in section 03 is what you pay for if you want to host: the timer, the sound packs and invites for your own games. Nothing moves a free account onto a paid plan unless you choose it.

03The subscription

• The plan: Table Stakes, US$7.99 a month, charged in US dollars, for hosts. Playing in somebody else's game needs no subscription. If your card is in another currency, your bank sets the exchange rate and any fee.
• Free trial: a host's first subscription starts with 30 days free. One free trial per person and per card: a card or an email address that has already had one (on any account, including one since deleted) can't start another, and a trial started on one is cancelled straight away with nothing charged. You can still subscribe; you're charged from the day you do. You give us a card when you start a trial, and nothing is charged during it. Unless you cancel before it ends, the subscription carries on and your card is charged US$7.99 on the day the trial ends, then every month on that date. We email you a reminder about a week before that first charge. Cancel during the trial and you're never charged.
• Billing: you're charged when you subscribe (or, with the free trial, when it ends) and then every month on the same date. Payment is handled by our payment processor, Stripe; we never see or store your full card number.
• Automatic renewal: the subscription renews automatically each month, and your card is charged the then-current price, until you cancel. By subscribing you authorise those recurring charges.
• Failed payments: if a charge fails, our payment processor retries it. Your seat keeps working for up to 7 days past the end of the period you've paid for while that happens; if the payment still hasn't gone through, the seat stops working until it does, and the subscription may be cancelled. The 7 days are for paying members: if the first charge after a free trial fails, your seat stops at the end of the trial and opens again as soon as a payment goes through.
• Price changes: if we ever change the price, we'll email you at least 30 days before your first charge at the new price. You can cancel before then and never pay it. If you don't cancel, the new price applies from that charge.
• Taxes: the price includes any tax we don't separately show. Where the law requires us to collect sales tax, GST/HST, QST or a similar tax, it will be shown to you before you pay.

04Cancelling, deleting and refunds

Cancelling. Cancel any time, online, from your account page. It takes you to our payment processor's secure billing page, where cancelling is a couple of clicks: no phone call, no exit survey. Your seat stays open until the end of the month you've already paid for, and you won't be charged again. Cancel during the free trial and your seat stays open until the trial ends, and you're never charged at all.

Deleting your account is different: it ends your subscription immediately, not at the end of the month, and permanently deletes your data as our privacy policy describes. There is no refund for the rest of that month, so if you want the time you've paid for, cancel first and delete later.

Refunds. Payments are non-refundable and we don't refund partial months (seven bucks, we're keeping the paperwork light), except where these terms say otherwise (see section 13) or where the law where you live gives you a right to one, in which case the law wins. If you think you've been charged in error, write to us and we'll sort it out.

05Using the software

While your subscription is active we give you a personal, limited, non-exclusive, non-transferable, revocable licence to install and run our software on up to three machines you own or control, for your own non-commercial use. You can't resell it, rent it, share the account, or strip out or get around the licence check. You can't copy, modify or reverse-engineer it, except where the law lets you regardless of what we say here. The software, the website, the dealer's voice and recordings, and our name and logo are ours or our licensors', and we keep all rights we don't expressly give you. If you send us ideas or feedback, we can use them without owing you anything.

06Your stuff

The blind structures, contacts, games, league results and player lists you make in the service are yours. You give us permission to store, copy, process and display them only as needed to run the service for you (syncing them to your machines, sending the invites you ask for, showing standings on a share link you turn on) and for no other purpose. You're responsible for what you put in, and for having the right to put it there.

07House rules

Use the service lawfully and decently. In particular:

• Only invite people who've said yes to hearing from you. You must have permission from each person you add before you have us email them, and you must only enter email addresses you're entitled to use. You can't add anybody's phone number, and you can't turn texts on for anybody: texts go only to people who switched them on themselves, on their own account (see Texts below). Stop inviting anyone who asks you to. Invites go out under your name, on your instruction.
• Social and home games. The service is for running social and home games among friends. Don't use it to organise, advertise or run a game that is illegal where it's played (for example, a game where the host or house takes a cut, fee or rake), and don't use it to facilitate any unlawful gambling. Whether your game is allowed where you live is your responsibility; the service is not legal advice about it.
• We don't handle money between players. The software records buy-ins and payouts that you type in; it does not hold, move or guarantee anyone's money. The pay buttons simply open Venmo, Cash App, PayPal or Zelle with a handle filled in. Those payments happen entirely in those apps, under their terms, between you and the other person: we are not a party to them and not responsible for them.
• At an online table. One seat per person, played by you: don't share your cards with anybody at the table or watching it, don't play for somebody else, and don't use software that plays or advises. Don't collude. The host, a co-host they name, or we can mute you or take you off a table for any of it. The chips at an online table are a count with no cash value on this site: we never hold, take or pay out money, nobody pays us to sit down, and whatever your game settles between players happens outside the service, between you, as above.
• No abuse. Don't use the service to harass, threaten, spam or impersonate anyone, to send anything unlawful, or to put in anyone's details without a good reason. Don't interfere with or overload the service, probe it for weaknesses, get into accounts or data that aren't yours, or scrape it.

Texts for game invites. Texts are something each person turns on for themselves, on their own account. A free player account is enough, once its email address is confirmed. Right after signing up, or later on their profile, they enter their own mobile number and tick a box, unticked to start with, that reads: “I agree to receive game invites and reminders from Degenerate Dealer by text at this number. Message frequency varies. Msg & data rates may apply. Reply STOP to opt out, HELP for help. Hosts who invite me can see this number.” We text a six-digit code to that number, and texts start only once the code is typed back in. From then on, invites from hosts who invite them, and reminders and notices about those games, come by text as well as email. Message frequency varies; message and data rates may apply. Reply STOP to any text to stop them, or HELP for help, or turn them off on the profile page, which deletes the number straight away. Hosts who invite someone can see the number they confirmed, but can't add, change or confirm a number for anyone. If someone replies STOP to one of our texts, we keep their phone number on a do-not-text list so that no host can text them through Degenerate Dealer again. That record is not removed when a host deletes the contact or closes their account, because stopping was the recipient's choice, not the host's. Replying START removes the number from the list. Agreeing to texts is never a condition of playing, of answering an invite or of having an account. Our privacy policy says what we keep and who sees it.

08The voice

The dealer swears. That's the product. The audio is explicit, crude and deliberate, and by using the service you accept that you'll hear it. There's a mute key if you're hosting the church group after all. Don't play it for anyone under 18 or anyone who hasn't signed up for it, and don't use the recordings outside the software. Texts we send for you are kept clean.

09Other people's services

The service relies on, and links to, services run by others, including our payment processor, email and text providers, hosting and fonts, and the payment apps behind the pay buttons. Those are governed by their own terms and privacy policies. We're not responsible for them, for their content, or for what they do, and we don't guarantee they'll be available.

10What we don't promise

The service is provided “as is” and “as available”. It's a clock: we've built it to be accurate to the second across a whole night, and if it isn't we genuinely want to hear about it. But to the extent the law allows, we make no warranties of any kind, express or implied (including of merchantability, fitness for a particular purpose, and non-infringement), and we don't guarantee the service will be uninterrupted, error-free, secure or right for the way you run your game, or that invites and texts will always arrive. Around a real table, it doesn't decide who wins. At an online table it deals the cards and settles each pot by the standard rules of Texas Hold'em, and we've built it to get every one right; if you ever think it got one wrong, tell us. It doesn't hold money, and it isn't legal advice. Some places don't allow implied warranties to be excluded, so some of this may not apply to you; any warranty the law won't let us exclude lasts only as long as the law requires.

11Liability

To the extent the law allows: our total liability to you for all claims to do with the service or these terms is capped at the amount you paid us in the twelve months before the event giving rise to the claim; and we're not liable for any indirect, incidental, special, consequential or punitive losses, or for lost profits, data, goodwill or gambling losses (including, for the avoidance of doubt, the money you lost with pocket jacks). Nothing in these terms limits liability that can't be limited by law, such as for our fraud, gross negligence or wilful misconduct, or for death or personal injury caused by our negligence. Some jurisdictions don't allow certain limits or exclusions, so they may not apply to you, and you may have additional rights under the consumer protection law where you live.

12Indemnity

If someone brings a claim against us because you broke these terms or the law, or because you sent invites to people without their permission, you agree to cover our reasonable losses and costs from that claim, including reasonable legal fees, to the extent they were caused by you. This doesn't apply to anything caused by our own fault, we'll tell you promptly about any such claim, and you may take part in defending it. Where your local law limits what a consumer can be asked to indemnify, this applies only to the extent that law allows.

13Ending it

You can stop using the service, cancel, or delete your account whenever you like, as section 04 describes. We may suspend or close your account if you seriously or repeatedly break these terms, if you don't pay, or if the law requires us to; where it's reasonable, we'll warn you first and give you a chance to fix things. If we close your account or end the service for any reason other than your breach, we'll refund the unused part of the month you've paid for. Section 06, as far as needed to wind things up, and sections 07 and 09 to 16 survive the end of this agreement.

14Changes to these terms

We may update these terms. If we change something that matters, we'll email you at least 30 days before the new version applies, and the date at the top will change. Keep using the service after that and you've accepted the new version. If you don't like it, cancel before it takes effect; we'll be sad, briefly. A change to section 15 won't apply to a dispute you've already told us about.

15Governing law and disputes

Governing law. These terms are governed by the laws of the State of Ohio and applicable US federal law, without regard to conflict-of-law rules. This does not take away any protection you have under the mandatory consumer protection laws of the state or province where you live.

Talk to us first. Most problems are fixed by an email. Before starting any claim, write to support@degeneratedealer.com describing the problem and what you want, and give us 30 days to try to resolve it.

Arbitration. If we can't resolve it, you and we agree that any dispute arising out of or relating to these terms or the service will be resolved by individual binding arbitration administered by the American Arbitration Association (AAA) under its Consumer Arbitration Rules, which are available at adr.org. The Federal Arbitration Act governs this agreement to arbitrate. The arbitrator may award the same individual relief a court could. Fees are paid as the AAA's consumer rules provide, which keeps your share low; a hearing, if any, will take place in the county where you live or by phone or video. Judgment on the award may be entered in any court with jurisdiction.

Small claims. Either of us may instead bring an individual claim in small claims court, if it qualifies and stays there.

No class actions, no jury. Claims may be brought only on an individual basis, not as a plaintiff or class member in any class, collective, consolidated or representative proceeding, and the arbitrator may not consolidate claims or award relief to anyone other than the individual party. You and we each waive the right to a jury trial. If this class-action waiver is found unenforceable for a particular claim, then that claim will not be arbitrated and will instead proceed in court.

Opting out. You can opt out of this agreement to arbitrate by emailing support@degeneratedealer.com within 30 days of first accepting these terms, with your name, your account email and a statement that you opt out of arbitration. Opting out doesn't affect anything else in these terms.

Where local law says otherwise. If you live in a Canadian province, such as Quebec or Ontario, or anywhere else whose law (including any consumer protection law) makes pre-dispute consumer arbitration agreements or class-action waivers unenforceable against you, then those parts of this section don't apply to you to that extent, and you may bring your claim in the courts where you live.

Courts. Any dispute that isn't arbitrated will be decided in the state or federal courts located in Ohio, unless the law where you live gives you the right to bring it in your local courts.

16General

These terms and the privacy policy are the whole agreement between you and us about the service. If any part of these terms is found unenforceable, that part will be limited or removed to the minimum extent necessary and the rest stays in full force. Our not enforcing something straight away isn't a waiver of it. You can't transfer your account or these terms to anyone else; we may transfer them to someone who takes over the service, and they'll be bound by them. Neither of us is responsible for delays caused by things outside our reasonable control. We may send you notices by email to the address on your account, and those count as being in writing.

17Contact

Questions about any of this: support@degeneratedealer.com, or talk to the house. A person reads it. Sal does not. Degenerate Dealer is a trade name of MemberPad LLC, based in Ohio, United States.